Tuesday, March 31, 2015

A monster with eyes of green

No, I don't think I will put on something less revealing. You're the one who decided to punish me for flirting with other women by turning me into a woman. Is it my fault that you made me so much hotter than you? Is it my fault that I'm a much better woman than you ever were? Since you changed me, all of your old friends prefer me to you, I got a modelling job that pays five times what my old one did, and I slept with both your brother and your sister (both better lovers than you, by the way). So, for the record, I'm not feeling terribly punished, but lest your jealousy get the best of you, forget about using the wand again. I accidentally dropped it into a wood chopper. Say goodbye to Leonardo for the last time. It's Lina from now on!

Thank you!

Thank you for all of your requests this month. I find that granting your wishes keeps me refreshed and inspired.

This Transformation Wine is delightful, and there is still a lot left in the bottle. If there is still a wish you would like me to grant, don't be afraid to make a request!

Monday, March 30, 2015

What I wished for

I guess I can't complain. I got everything I wished for: perfect health, fantastic sex twice a day, and millions of dollars. I guess I should have made it clearer that I did NOT wish for a vagina or a husband. Oh, well.