Dude, we've been here almost a full day at this resort, and I haven't seen a single one if the hot chicks you promised. As soon as I'm done with these chocolates they gave me, I'm going to cut my losses and hop the first plane to Jamaica...why are you looking at me like that? Why do I feel so tingly? Oh, my God! I'm changing! Do something! And by 'do something', I don't mean 'take off your pants'!
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